Avoidance Does Not Equal Reconciliation

“But I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell. So if you are presenting a sacrifice at the altar in the Temple and you suddenly remember that someone has something against you, leave your sacrifice there at the altar. Go and be reconciled to that person. Then come and offer your sacrifice to God.”
—Matthew 5:22-24 NLT

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to join 300 students and leaders to worship Jesus at our annual Winter Retreat. It was an incredible weekend where we were able to disconnect from the busyness of the world and connect with God.

However… was everyone able to disconnect? Were some people divided, caught between a situation at home and the desire to fully experience God? How many hoped to flee to the retreat and leave their problems and arguments behind, only to realize it was challenging to avoid them while trying to worship?

In the scripture above, Jesus draws on one of the Old Testament laws and challenges the people on how to manage anger and confrontations. He goes as far as saying that if you come to the temple to offer a sacrifice and realize you have “beef” with someone… you better leave that sacrifice at the altar and go be reconciled. In other words, Jesus is saying: don’t bring Him a divided spirit—one that is torn between confrontation with others and worshiping Him. Be reconciled first, and then come to worship. Seems pretty hardcore, right? Why would Jesus say something like that?

Ever been there? Entering church to worship, trying to leave that unresolved argument behind, hoping it will somehow work itself out or be forgotten? It’s the easy thing, right—to let the messy work sort itself out? I mean, why get into another tough conversation if you don’t have to? How could anything good come out of following up on that situation?

It is in this place that Jesus finds us and calls us to address unfinished conversations or unresolved problems. He asks us to enter uncomfortable situations to find resolution—to seek reconciliation before presenting our sacrifice of worship to Him.

But why? Doesn’t God desire our worship? And that disagreement, that confrontation… it has nothing to do with our ability to worship God. Or does it? Why would God care about that? Why would our issues with others be important to God when compared to our praising Him?

Think about the last time you had an argument or confrontation with someone. How easy was it to focus on other tasks that day? For me, if my wife and I get in a disagreement that’s left unresolved, I have a hard time concentrating on anything else. Tell me you’ve never been there, because denial is just as bad as avoidance.

Somehow that issue… it doesn’t go away, does it? No—it continues to replay like a broken record. Whoops—we’re in the 21st century. I mean, like a buffering YouTube video that keeps replaying the same part because you’re stuck on 3G instead of 4G LTE… which I have no idea how these differ, other than one is faster, right?

You see, our God is a jealous God, and He does not want half-distracted worship—or a partially given heart. No, He wants it all. Just like the scriptures say: leave that sacrifice at the altar and go be reconciled so He can have your whole heart—your undivided attention.

I believe Jesus has two takeaways for us this week regarding reconciliation and worship:

1. Recognizing God’s Jealousy
Our Father in Heaven is crazy about you! He wants your undivided attention. He wants your WHOLE heart. He loves your unbroken praise! However, when we try to avoid situations, confrontations, or disagreements, we come to Him with fractured praise and a half-focused heart. God wants all of your focus, all of your attention… all of YOU.

2. Wholeness & Reconciliation
Scripture after scripture shows God’s heart to reconcile His people—not only to Himself but also to each other. God desires restoration and wholeness. When we stop neglecting or avoiding difficult situations, we begin to find healing. When we leave our sacrifice at the altar and seek resolution and reconciliation, we find wholeness and righteousness.

So where are you today? Have you been bringing God only a portion of your worship because you are tied up in issues with others? Have you been avoiding that discussion or that person, hoping they might forget?

Today is the day. Have that hard conversation. Seek reconciliation. Your Father in Heaven is crazy about you, and He craves your undivided heart. He desires to make you whole and to mend your relationships with others. So, where do you need to go? Who do you need to talk to? What problem do you need to discuss as you leave your sacrifice at His altar?